Why Worry?
A friend has this quotation on his office wall:
"I know worry works because nothing I worry about ever happens."
I think I must believe that, because I worry a lot
-- and about the most insignificant things. I worry about the big things, of
course, like health, relationships, and finances. But I'm also liable to fret
about anything and everything that finds its way into my consciousness.
Because I spend so much time on worry, I've decided
to embrace it with a personal research project. Maybe you'd like to join me.
Here are two avenues I'm exploring:
1) I practice catching myself at it. "Hey, I'm
worrying again." During a recent morning swim, I caught myself worrying 10
times during one lap! I'm not kidding. On rare days when I don't have anything
to worry about, I find something. What I've learned is that worry is a mental
habit. I can change habits; I've done it before. There's hope.
2) My second approach is to practice presence. By
this I mean stopping my thoughts. In my workshops, I ring a bell to help
participants practice centering. The quieter we are, the longer we hear the
bell. There's a lovely moment when we all listen . . . until the ring is barely
audible . . . then just a memory. I relish that moment of quiet before my
thoughts re-engage. There is no future or past, just Now. No worrying thoughts
-- no thoughts at all. It's a peaceful place, which is why I stretch the
moment. I want to strengthen the connection to something greater than my
worries.
3) When I told my good friend Rosie about my worry
project, she told me about her approach, which is to do one of three things:
decide to address the issue right then; if you can't do anything about it at
the moment, give yourself a time to address it later; or decide that it is not
important and let it go. In other words, act on it, file it or throw it away.
4) Finally, one of Rosie's favorite worry stoppers
(and mine) is to sing. Connect with your self, your creativity, and the place
where everything really is okay.
Awareness and acknowledgment are the keys to
changing our habits. Morihei Ueshiba, who founded aikido and spoke of it as the
Art of Peace, said we must "always practice the Art of Peace in a vibrant
and joyful manner." Perhaps my research project on worry will help me to
lighten up, smile, and live each day in such a way.
Are you worrying? Stop your thoughts for a moment.
Listen to the sounds around you, pay attention, and be present to this key
moment. And smile . . . for no reason. You may find that's the best reason of
all.
Jim and Jeanetta Pollard
http://TheFabulousFifties.net
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